For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11.
“Chris, you need to come back home, I have something I need to tell you.” I cried into the phone. It was February 10, 1999 and I was sitting in my bedroom on the floor staring in unbelief at the two pink lines of the pregnancy test I took at the women’s health clinic. In his heart, Chris already knew what I had to say, but both of us thought it was next to impossible for something like this to happen to us. Seventeen and pregnant was not something that happens everyday. At least I never thought it would happen to me. It wasn’t my plan. It wasn’t Chris’ plan either. Apparently God had different plans! By the way, if you ever want to see something fail, try making plans without consulting God first…
I think of that moment often when our anniversary rolls around. That year, everything changed for me. I graduated high school, moved out of my mom’s house, got married, and had a baby. Looking back over the last ten years, I can see God’s hand in every part of my life. He alone knew that the only way to reach me was to make me a mother, and that child would bring Chris and I together for better or for worse. This child would also lead us to Jesus. As funny as it sounds, she did. It was in Cheyenne’s matter of fact belief that made us question if Jesus really existed. It was in her conception that we thought about miracles. It was in all the prayers of her caregivers at Sonshine World that prayed for her lost and broken parents. In was in God’s plans all this time. Although some like to argue that this was not in God’s plan. However anyone sees it, my life is a reminder that God takes all imperfections and works it for the greater good, for His plan. He knew what choices I would make before I was even a twinkle in my mother’s eye. So how’s that for a Master Plan?
It takes my breath away to think that no matter the path that I chose, God knew and would orchestrate all for His good because of His love for me. Not only did He love me enough to pursue me, He gave up His Son for me to take away my shame, my tears, and my sins. The last ten years are a testament of God’s existence, of His Divine nature. Even the smallest of moments were woven together to give me a better future than the one I had planned for myself.
Chris and I celebrated our ten year anniversary last week. We reminisced over our teen years of outsmarting our parents and sometimes law enforcement. We laughed at how legendary and crazy our ‘last minute’ wedding was. We cried over the hurt we cause each other and thanked God together over the mercy and plans God laid out for us. We look forward to the next decade together and are even more excited to see how God continues to mold and shape us. His plans are so much better than mine. The future used to look so bleak and gray. With God sitting on His throne in the horizon, I look forward and continue to take each day as a moment planned in time for His purpose and His hope for me.